UNDER MY UMBRELLA

Do pardon me for holding this back for so long. I somehow have a feeling that I am in a transitional phase right now-physically, mentally ,emotionally and spiritually and hence not really getting time to put words cohesively on print here. But here I am with my new post with my new umbrella, haha. Thank you for showing so much love to this outfit on my social media, you can read the style story now, finally!

We Dilliwallas are truly in a better looking weather right now (it only looks better but the kind of diseases in the air, ugghh). Its not too hot, its slightly cooler and the skies are serving as the most gorgeous backdrop for my pictures. I have been complimented so much for this look that I thought besides my amazing photographer, I have to share the other secret behind this positive look with umbrella.

For the longest time I have wondered how people sound so convinced about the way they are chasing a certain dream. I often wondered, how are they so sure they will reach there. I thought they are maybe just blessed or lucky to get things their way, do they even know the struggles of those whose fates seem sealed or who have so many thorns on the way, it breaks their back plucking them out?

It definitely looked like I had done some bad Karma in a previous life.

I honestly am not a dumbass, I have been a bright child, a reasonably intelligent and skillful adult, I have been raising a beautiful child for 10 years, then why really do I feel like a non achiever?

How do others get up every day saying its a beautiful day and we will go after our dreams? Don’t they have family pressures or duties or criticism to dim their sparkle?

How are they so happy while I feel clearly pathetic almost every day?

Do I have an unnaturally negative attitude or am I such a big loser that I hardly succeed or am I over sensitive to my environment and I give too much a thought to others’ opinions?

I finally did get a few answers recently.

Firstly, I have been watering the weeds in my life rather than watering the flowers.

Secondly, I have not fully realized my potential, in fact almost none of it.

Thirdly, I have been knocking on the wrong doors.

Fourthly, I have been pushing my self interest to a future date for too long.

Finally and most importantly, NOW I KNOW!

They say self realization is the first step towards a successful future. I may have taken the first step a tad too late but its better late than never. I guess the fact that I am not competing with anyone but myself each day is enough to set my standards right.

Now I am not constantly worrying about my income or my kid or my parents or obsessing about my shortcomings. It just makes me feel so much lighter and more empowered without even achieving anything. I guess the pressure of wanting to achieve was killing me so much that it just in fact became a negative.

But let me also tell you that all this TRANSFORMATION happens when some other things happen. It could be anything- a sighting, a dream, a person, a view ,a situation. I mean you got to be lucky to stumble upon that miracle drug someday to see the light rather than worry about lights out. I guess I found mine and that just makes me feel good inside.

I have finally discovered what all I want to shade under my umbrella and what all to attack with it.

And honestly, things are changing, I can sense the happiness now. I can see things better, I see good signs coming my way.

You have to have the strength to go after it, always and then miraculously, everything begins to fall in place.

colossal closet, mansi wadhwa, under my umbrella, ootd, motivational, happy, zara, daniel wellington